Tag Archive | mid-life

Letting go

????????????????????????????????????????????The past is always a part of who you are. We all live in the present, but many of our choices are made based on past experiences. Unfortunately not all past experiences are good. So when do we let go of the past and move on? How do we know what do keep from our past, and what to discard?

Our brain creates emotional triggers from the things we experience, whether good or bad. Our brain has a tendency to refer back to the original experiences even when a new one happens. Sometimes this creates a false trigger even if the experience and situation is not exactly the same. This can lead to false assumptions and sometimes wrong decisions. So how do you watch out for this?

  • Try to pin point the present feeling your having with a similar one from the past. (dig deep).
  • Once you’ve determined the original feeling, write down all the ways the current situation differs. You’ll eventually realize that although the emotional feeling was triggered, more than likely the situation is not the same, and can be handled differently.

Things to remember:

  • Holding on to the past, prevents you from growing in the future.
  • Life happens until the moment you die.  If all you do is look back, you’ve stopped living.
  • Stop being who you once were so you can become who you are today.
  • Letting go is not a weakness, it’s a strength.
  • Be thankful that night turns into day, that goals turn into realities.  Use your positive fuel to reach for tomorrow.

Are you ready to let go?

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No Care for Baby Boomers

o-ELDER-CARE-MILITARY-facebookThere are 10,000 Baby Boomers hitting age 65 each day. They’re becoming caregivers, as well as those needing care. People are living longer than ever, and many Boomers will be caring for their children and parents at the same time.

The fact that Boomers had fewer children than earlier generations, and both men and women are living longer, makes a recipe for fewer caregivers in the years to come. It is projected that by 2030 there will be only four potential caregivers available for each person 80 or older, down from a high of more than seven in 2010.

The average caregiver in 2009 was a 49-year-old woman who had a job outside the home and spent nearly 20 hours per week providing unpaid care to her mother, according to a 2011 AARP Public Policy Institute study.

YIKES!! These statistics are frightening! I’m 47 right now, and in 20 years I’ll be 67, with no one to take care of me? It’s a looming thought, and unfortunately a very realistic one. I can no longer hide my head in my electronic devices. ( I would have said “sand” but electronic devices is where my head is these days).

I can already predict that care-giving is not going to be easy for me, or my children when it’s their turn.

I have done web design for several clients who are senior advocates. A senior advocate helps families find the best senior living options for their needs and budget. They talk to you about your loved one’s medical conditions, level of independence, behavioral and nutritional needs, and hobbies. Based on your loved one’s condition, they advise about location and financial resources to narrow your options for care. Many of them are FREE, and are paid by the care facilities.

Where and what condition will your loved be 10 years from now? Maybe you’re already at that care-giving stage. Here are a few questions that you’ll want to explore:

Does your loved one have advanced health care insurance? How much does it cover and how long does it last? Are they eligible for Medicare?, What about an advanced health care directive or a will? Where’s the mortgage, the title to the car, bank accounts, insurance policies, stocks and bonds? Is an Estate Plan needed? Who in the family should have power of attorney, legal and medical, to keep track of end of life wishes and ensure they’re carried out? AARP’s 35 questions for an aging parent

The health of your aging loved one is something to certainly consider in the coming years. Women are especially living longer without husbands, so planning for your parent or loved one’s future, both medically and financially now, is critical before things become a crisis.

Autumn, time for a change

Photo Aug 20, 8 02 52 PMRight now I’d love to hold on to August and the warm summer days indefinitely, but like it or not, September is just around the corner. The hustle and bustle and business of work, school and sports will once again take charge of our lives.
I will treasure the time that my daughter and I spent together this summer while she was home from college. She was away working at a Christian camp most of the summer, but the last few weeks I’ve enjoyed her company. We shopped, and tore through our movie list that we made at the beginning of the summer. She’s off to college again this weekend. I will miss her.
As the autumn comes, the trees change color, lose their leaves, and the weather gets cooler. As we gear up for another Fall season, it is the best time to take full responsibility of what happened in the previous seasons, both good and bad. We must remember that the crops that were harvested during the summer, produces the fruit that sustains us through the barren season.

Seasons of Life

Photo Jul 06, 8 01 26 PMThose nasty little Arachnids are about to make their debut again this August in Southern California, hanging from the trees as they travel furiously back and forth, spinning their little webs at dusk. The one thing I do like about the Lord’s changing nature seasons, is that they are somewhat predictable. God’s simple creatures anticipate, and appreciate the seasons. Their circadian clock never fails to kick in when it’s time.

I think sometimes as we age, we fight God’s seasons, anticipating the worst. We begrudgingly deal with our less-than-pleasant present: a regimen of chemo, financial setbacks, the empty nest. Are you experiencing a winter of discouragement, cold and icy through your soul?

Success in life is often cyclical. Success doesn’t last forever. Soon the winds of change will come, and everything will be dead and barren. But the Lord gave us TIME. ( Ecclesiastes 3:1 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven). Time allows us to take advantage of the season among us, to adjust to its newness, and prepare once again to settle into some sort of routine.

What season of life are you in? Whatever your season, embrace the opportunities of life.

Baked Meatballs

Simple Italian Meatball recipe. I serve with vermicelli.

spaghetti

1 lb hamburger
2 eggs, beaten with 1/2 cup milk
1/2 cup grated Parmesan
1 cup bread crumbs
1 small onion, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 teaspoon oregano
1 teaspoon garlic salt
pinch of parsley
freshly ground pepper to taste

Mix all ingredients with hands.
Form into golf ball sized meatballs. Bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees.
Add to tomato sauce and cook for 20 minutes.  Serve with your favorite pasta.

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40 is the new 30

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Why  40 is the new 30? 
It is becoming accepted that a person turning 40 has fewer limitations when it comes to health and lifestyle options than those of previous generations.

When most people hit 40 they are more in tune with who they are and what they want in life. Making a career change is easier to do, and in my case, the kids are older and now I can focus on my own wants and desires. This is a great time for those turning forty to reevaluate their lives, and look forward to new adventures.

40 is the new 30 because it’s a great time to start making the plans that some have thought would never come.  Forty is a great time to start working on the life that you may have always wanted.

I must admit, I’ve actually loved this decade!  BUT, despite the new and positive outlook about Forty, there are some things that are inevitable!

You know you’re over 40 when. . .

1. Your kids think you’re old
2. You’ve never worn make-up in your life, and now you have to
3. You’ve never worn glasses in your life, but now your arms aren’t long enough
4. You walk around for 5 minutes looking for your reading glasses, and your daughter tells you they’re sitting on your head
5. You wear a fanny pack to the swap meet, and your kids refuse to walk with you
6. Gaining weight is easy, losing weight is impossible
7. Earth, Wind and Fire songs are considered oldies
8. Everything you wore in high school is back
9. You begin to look forward to the empty nest
10. When you hold up your boobs you actually have a waste
11. You begin to think your dog might out live you
12. You rush up the stairs to get something and you stare blankly when you get to the top
13. Socks and flannel are your wardrobe of choice in bed
14. Your kids say you stare at them all the time
15. You look forward to spending time with your iPad in bed
16. You would rather text your son than walk up the stairs
17. An “all nighter” means heartburn
18. It’s always 90 degrees, even in the winter
19. An “outing” is walking the dog
20. A “date” is having no kids at home for the evening
21. The junk you thought you left in your trunk is now following you
22. Your diet is now FREE . . . gluten-free, wheat free, dairy free
23. Instead of talking to yourself out loud, you blog!

Let me know how your decade is treating you!